About a week or so ago, I saw articles going around Twitter and from other people I follow about the campaign against the word "bossy."  If a word is truly offensive, I agree that it needs to be banned from our lexicon.  But I scratched my head wondering what the word bossy had done to anyone.

When I looked up the definition of bossy, I found that the dictionary defines the word as "inclined to domineer; dictatorial."  I agree with those who are part of the "Ban Bossy" campaign that that doesn't sound very nice.  But here's my problem with that whole campaign....they are looking to change the wrong narrative.  Once the word bossy is banned, another word used to describe strong women who don't take any crap will just pop up in its place.  Chances are, it will be far worse than "bossy."  For the record, there are men who act this way too.  Why are they never called bossy?  Oh, that's right, we call them strong leaders......

Instead of getting rid of a word, how about we teach young girls to not let themselves be defined by one word?  According to the "Ban Bossy" campaign, when young girls are called bossy by their counterparts, they no longer raise their hands in class or seek leadership positions.  When I hear that I don't see a problem with a word so much as I see a problem with other people.  When did being a strong female become such a problem?  I've been called bossy pretty much my whole life.  It doesn't phase me in the least.  When kids called me that in school and I went home to talk to my mom about it, she coached me in the way we should be coaching our young women.  She told me that meant I was taking charge and doing something right.  That has stuck with me for the rest of my life.  If people want to call me bossy, I'm ok with it.  If they want to call me the other word for women that starts with a "b," that's ok by me too.  I've been called both more times then I can count.

Instead of banning bossy, the word should be redefined.  Bossy women only appear "dictatorial and domineering" because we still as a society have issues with strong women who have a voice and a backbone.  Women who I know who would be considered "bossy" are strong, they don't take any crap, they aren't scared of anyone, and they get crap done!  And if they have to bust a couple heads together, step on some toes, or hurt a few feelings to accomplish things, they will.  To me, a bossy woman is a strong female who doesn't take crap from anyone, men or women.  They have a voice, and they aren't scared to use it.  If they see a closed door, they break it down.  If they see a glass ceiling, they look for the hammer they are going to use to shatter it.  Why on earth wouldn't we want to teach that to the young women of today?  Instead of being demure and raising their hand and asking for something, they need to stand up and demand what is rightfully theirs.  None of this "lean in" garbage!!  I'm not "leaning in" or asking nicely for my time, my leadership position, my seat at the boardroom table, nothing.  I'm going to use my voice and demand it.

If we teach young girls to simply ease their way into leadership, it will never happen.  There are still too many people, other women included, who will try to hold them back.  Women need to be bold and push their way in.  Don't raise your hand and politely ask if it's your turn yet.  Make it your turn!  Kick down the door.  Don't lean into a role; demand the role that you are qualified for.  Don't take any crap from anyone.  Be the boss!  And if you get called bossy and a whole host of other words, don't sweat it for a second.  That means you are doing something right!